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Mourning ~The Dark Side of Life

Writer's picture: Alpha QueenAlpha Queen

Updated: Mar 7, 2020

When you rise in the morning and open your eyes, something is on your mind.


It may be checking your phone for any missed notifications or checking your planner to map out any pre-scheduled invitations. Whatever it may be, we all wake up thinking about something.

As you start your day, there's typically a routine you follow. It could be going to the bathroom to wash your face and brush your teeth, completing a morning workout session, or enjoying a cup of coffee. Whatever it is throughout that time, how often did the thought of someone else pop into your head? At least once or twice, I'm sure, but did you stop what you were doing to pick up the phone or maybe even send a text to ask how they've been? Perhaps even a quick email to mention how much they mean to you?


Most people would answer no to that question. We tend to treat our loved ones as if we can put them on ice until we're ready to come for them again. We have reached a point where the line of self-care becomes self-indulgent, but to remain human, you have to be selfless.

It sounds like a lot to handle, but it's the act of balancing these two that will create harmony in one's life. The problem isn't a lack of love. It's the lack of compassion, empathy, and respect that society has for one another. No one knows or feels how much they are truly loved until they're witnessing the outpour of the sentiment from another realm.


Even with this cliche existing, so many are wholly uprooted over death. The regret of not declaring all you wanted to share while the person was alive eats at you every moment they are gone. The debilitating grief and inability to cope is the reason families fall apart after death. Life doesn't only stop for the deceased, those left to live stop living.


The process of mourning is not an exciting experience to look forward to for anyone. It's dark, gloomy, and depressive. Those mourning are usually sad, regretful, and in torturous conditions mentally. There may be comfort from other family and friends, but some have a very challenging time restoring life. They go throughout life in agony and despair.


"About 2.5 million people die in the United States annually, each leaving an average of five grieving people behind. It's estimated that 1.5 million children (5% of children in the United States) have lost one or both parents by age 15."


There's an old saying that goes, Live today like tomorrow is your last. Living life, full of love. Expressing it and manifesting it every second, every minute, every hour and every day. When the time comes, would you think the process of grieving would be easier for your loved ones?

Every day when you wake in the morning, you turn to the love of your life and say, I love you, and I always will. If we go our separate ways today and one of us shall not return, know that I love you, and I always will.


This is something I do with my children. It doesn't matter if I am running errands for the day. When I leave the house or before we lay down to sleep for the night, We say our goodbyes. It has no negative connotations in our life. There's much talk about life and living, perhaps death should be addressed just as much.


Life comes to those who live, and death comes to those who wait.


Learn to live and appreciate every moment that you have because the time you take for granted now is time you may pay back in mourning. Make use of actively putting in the effort of more time spent with loved ones.


When a loved one dies, the family and friends suffer the most. Though tragic, everything we face has something positive to teach us, a lesson of some sort. I've always believed that death was never about the people selected to leave this realm. I concluded that death was a lesson for the souls attached to the ones leaving this earth. One thing we must learn how to do is live in the now, Not tomorrow or yesterday but now.


The world is outside of your control, but living is not.


Show the people around you how much you care about them while they are alive to feel it. Death is imminent, and it's only a few loved ones ahead of you before it's your time. Remember, with appreciation, all that you had but learn to make peace with all that you have now.

In the blink of an eye, it could all be over. But in the meantime, living is your best option.


As a child, my grandmother would tell me, Don't say Goodbye, say I'll see you later.


Well, knowing what I know today, I say differently.

I don't know where your soul is assigned once it leaves this place,

so before I go, I will say goodbye, and I love you.


Jahiem said it best back in the 90s, Just in case, I don't make it home tonight.



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